Well, gee whiz and holy cow, am I glad I decided to update about my visit today! The whole world has turned on this sucker today! LOL! 1st about my visit. It's weird talking to Pat after her visit because it was Mom that was awful today when I went! Dad was not himself, but he looked fine. He was so edgy---like he was fixing to have a fit---about anything. He was complaining about lunch not coming, and that he wasn't hungry, and that he'd already fixed himself a chicken sandwich, etc. He kept rolling away from the table and just seemed so agitated (sp?). Jon went with me and we rolled them back to their room. We got Dad some tobacco and Jon put the tv on the ballgame, and he seemed better when we left. Mom was so sad. She was like major drugged acting. She was sitting at the table all slumped over and cryed when I started talking to her, etc. I left Jon with her and Dad and went to talk to the nurse. I asked what med they'd given her today. She said nothing but her heart med. I said then why is she acting like this---has she been this way all day. The lady looked back and said they'd given her adivan (sp?) last night at 6. It's for anxiety. I've wondered all day what she was so anxious about last night at 6! Anyway, I told them I did NOT like how she was today! I didn't. She was pitiful. After we talked to her, she began to perk up and act better. Another one of the nurses came in to see if she wanted a nap. She told me Mom had been up since 6:30---by that time it was nearly 1:30. Jon and I left not long after that thinking maybe she DID need a nap. Anyway, they were very clean as was the room. Neither ate much of anything for lunch. Both drank their nutrish milk and Mom ate about 1/2 a roll. Dad I don't think ate anything. His blood sugar used to run around 150. 103 would have been low for his norm. I know they want it around 100, but his wasn't. As for the DNR stuff---I think of it as when they go in the room and they've stopped breathing, etc for whatever cause and have basically died. I cringe writing this it is such a sad topic. In my opinion, if they've died---let them be. I'm sorry, but there is very little quality to their life. I believe that everything that should be done to treat them should be done, but not to bring them back if they've gone. Give them meds for whatever they can have meds for. It's definitely something that needs to be discussed in person and not in a flat front like this blog. We need to think about this----no matter how hard. Jamie is so right in that if we didn't give a crap, this would be no big deal---any of it. Because we do, the hard just keeps coming. Leisa thank you for your honesty and caring. You definitely have a different perspective on it than I do since you deal with it in a professional way. So much heavy stuff. I will be SO glad for us to all be together to talk and try to come to some understanding about all of this. It's just never going to get any easier dealing with/caring for Mom and Dad. I wish it was. Bruce told me today that the emotional part of putting them in was just the beginning. He said he was afraid that we all thought that by doing this it would make them better and well. He's right in some way because we all wanted them to be safe, taken care of, etc. Maybe I did think that this would turn back time and help. Hey, at this rate, I'm going to need the help! LOL! Love you all, Jeanie